A Sudden Silence: When a Medical Procedure Stole a Musical Future
In 2008, Freya Bennett, a 21-year-old music student at the Victorian College of the Arts in Melbourne, faced a life-altering moment after a routine ear syringing procedure. Initially prescribed antibiotic drops for an ear issue, she visited a doctor to have them washed out, feeling relief as the muffled world cleared. However, that relief was short-lived. As she lay in bed that night, a strange static noise emerged in her left ear, followed by a puzzling crunching sound that turned out to be her grandfather clock chiming—a stark sign her hearing was distorted.
The Diagnosis and Dismissal of a Dream
After days with no improvement, Bennett returned to the doctor, who referred her urgently to an ear, nose, and throat specialist. During a six-week wait, her world crumbled. Her saxophone, once a source of joy, became an unbearable cacophony, and music venues triggered tears as she struggled with the noise. The ENT specialist diagnosed degenerative hearing loss, predicting eventual deafness or surgery, but dismissed any link to the syringing as coincidence. A second opinion confirmed significant hearing loss in her left ear, likely caused by the procedure, yet brushed off concerns by noting her right ear was perfect and she would adapt to tinnitus and deafness.
Rebuilding a Life Beyond Music
Bennett pushed through to graduate in 2009 but soon stopped playing music entirely, her saxophone gathering dust as shame settled in. Gradually, she found new creative outlets, turning to writing and founding an online magazine, Ramona. Despite persistent tinnitus and deafness in one ear, she embraced editing and mentoring young creatives, and learned to enjoy concerts with ear protection, interviewing musicians without envy. She discovered that ear syringing is no longer recommended due to high risks, and her tinnitus now serves as a stress barometer, flaring during anxiety but reminding her to slow down.
Finding Joy in the Audience
Over 15 years, Bennett has made peace with her changed reality. In 2023, she danced at a Harry Styles concert in Melbourne with earplugs, soaking up the atmosphere without jealousy. Last year, she took her daughter to see Norwegian singer Aurora, and this year, she plans to support local acts. No longer avoiding concerts out of fear of longing, she now appreciates music as a source of joy rather than a reminder of lost dreams. While her life's course was drastically altered, she no longer wishes to be a musician, content to watch others shine on stage.
