The 15-Minute Oral Sex Offer That Ended My Dating App Experiment
When Almara Abgarian decided to dip her toe back into the world of online dating after finding herself briefly single, she anticipated some changes in the digital dating landscape. What she encountered, however, was something far more shocking than she could have imagined.
Within just 15 minutes of matching with a complete stranger named Eli on a dating app, she received a message that would make even the most seasoned dater blush: "I would love to have my head between your legs right now." The conversation, which began with the usual pleasantries, had rapidly escalated into an unsolicited offer of oral sex.
A Pattern of Unwanted Advances
Eli wasn't an isolated case in what Abgarian describes as a "hellish" modern dating environment. Another match, Jimmy, offered what she termed a "full penetrative package" while boasting about his high success rate with hook-ups. What made these interactions particularly jarring was that minutes before Eli's explicit offer, Abgarian had clearly stated she had no interest in casual sex.
"I entertained his line of conversation for a while because I found it funny and challenged him – which ironically just seemed to make him more keen," she noted in her account published on November 28, 2025.
The problem extends beyond her personal experience. Her female friends report similar frustrations with men approaching them for sex despite their profiles clearly stating they're seeking serious relationships. Meanwhile, a male friend has abandoned dating altogether, tired of uninspiring conversations.
From Past Experiences to Present Realisations
This isn't Abgarian's first encounter with disappointing dating behaviour. She recalls dating Dylan several years earlier when she was in her mid-twenties. Despite his profile stating he wanted a long-term relationship, red flags soon appeared as he persistently tried to steer conversations toward sex.
Reflecting on how she might have handled such situations differently in the past, Abgarian realised: "Had I crossed paths with Eli or Jimmy five years ago, things might have played out very differently."
Other horrifying pickup lines she's encountered include:
- "I can see your nipples are talking to me"
- "You look like you're great in bed"
- Unsolicited comments about her breast size
The Silver Lining in a Sea of Disappointment
After just an hour on the app, Abgarian deleted it and began dating someone from her past. Despite the negative experience, she considers the experiment successful because it helped her realise something crucial: "I am no longer willing to accept less than what I want and need."
She offers hope to others struggling with modern dating: "You will never regret respecting your own needs." Her advice for those facing similar situations is straightforward: if you don't want casual sex but keep getting approached by creeps online, just "laugh and say 'no thanks, bye', then unmatch."
For those only seeking sex, she suggests being upfront but approaching with "smooth seduction" rather than crude propositions. The most concerning trend she's noticed is how often people settle for less than they deserve, hoping their partner will change - something she describes from experience as a "pointless endeavour."
Despite the current state of dating in the UK being so dire that people are giving up on finding love altogether, Abgarian maintains that "you deserve amazing, toe-curlingly fantastic experiences with people who appreciate your magic." Her final piece of advice? "Stick to your guns."
