Walking into a pub and approaching the bar without a clear idea of what you want to order is a surefire way to become the bane of every bartender's existence. According to industry professionals, this common habit not only slows down service but also tests the patience of staff, especially during peak hours. Todd N, North London Account Manager at Beavertown, emphasizes the cumulative impact of indecisiveness, noting, 'It's a small thing, but when the queue is three people deep, extra seconds or minutes add up.'
Why Bartenders Hate Indecisive Customers
Lisa Williams, landlady of The Cricketers Pub in Farncombe, Surrey, shares her frustration: 'You can always spot the customers who haven't thought about what they order until they get to me. They stare at me then start thinking, it drives me crazy!' This sentiment is echoed by Phil McAree, general manager of the Hoop and Grapes in Clerkenwell, who attributes such behavior to 'novice drinkers' and the 'part-time' crowd that only frequents pubs during festive seasons.
Phil explains that indecisiveness hampers efficiency, as bar staff are trained to handle large orders but require a clear directive to execute them swiftly. 'It's a bit frustrating because our team are drilled to cope with big orders, but they need the order so they can figure out what the best way to go about it,' he tells Metro. 'So if you've got someone who's like "I'll have this, and then have a little think about it, and then, oh yeah, so and so wanted this", it makes it a lot slower. All bar staff are aiming to do is just deliver that round of drinks as quickly as possible, and move on to the next punter.'
The Golden Rule: Order Guinness First
Beyond knowing your order, the sequence in which you place it matters. Dougal Sharp, founder and master brewer at Innis and Gunn, advises that stout, particularly Guinness, should always be ordered first. 'They're never a quick hand-over like a lager or a spirit and mixer, so ordering the stout first means the bartender can pour it, let it settle, and get on with the rest of the order at the same time. You're back at the table quicker, and it helps bar staff keep things moving when it's busy.'
Becky McCabe, co-founder of drinks brand training app Brandee, highlights the science behind this: it takes 119.5 seconds to pour the perfect pint of Guinness, and those two minutes can make or break a busy service. By giving bartenders a heads-up, she says, 'the team will quietly love you. It makes service smoother, eases the pressure behind the bar, and marks you down as a top customer.'
The Ideal Pub Patron: Traits That Endear You to Staff
Phil McAree, with over 20 years in the industry, lists the characteristics of the best customers: they are polite and empathetic, know their order before reaching the bar, return empty glasses, engage in chat when it's quiet but understand when staff are busy, and know how to drink responsibly. 'Someone who can put a few away and not turn into some sort of drooling monster' is highly valued, as is support for the establishment itself. 'The more people you can garner like that, the better the pub is going to be for it.'
Returning your glass to the bar is a simple gesture that earns immense gratitude. 'There's something magical about it,' Phil says. 'We're like, "wow, what an amazing person", falling over ourselves. It's our job to go and get the empty glasses, but it's sort of like a little token of thanks.'
Expert Advice and Statistics
A 2025 YouGov poll found that 45% of Brits believe they can pour a perfect pint of Guinness on their first try, but Lisa Williams disputes this, noting, 'The ones who order Guinness last have obviously never poured a pint of it in their life.' She adds, 'I could serve twice as fast if everyone knew what they wanted and ordered the tricky ones first. Luckily I've managed to train my regulars well.'
Phil, who reopened the Grade II listed Hoop and Grapes this month after its closure in 2019, observes that his clientele 'tend to know what they want,' but even when they don't, he remains philosophical: 'At the end of the day, they're paying our wages.' Still, he acknowledges that in hospitality, certain behaviors 'endear you to people a lot more,' and politeness is paramount.
To avoid being the customer bartenders dread, remember: come prepared, order the stout first, and show appreciation for the staff. These small courtesies not only speed up service but also make the pub experience more pleasant for everyone involved.
