While men aren't fans of the classic cowgirl and women hate it in reverse, preferences in bed are always a hot topic. However, there is one position that both men and women agree is 'one of the worst ever': the 69. Both sexes share the same complaint: they dislike multitasking.
Why Men Dislike the 69
A 28-year-old man wrote on Reddit: 'Not a fan. I love giving. I love receiving. 69 makes it hard for me to enjoy either part. I don't like someone's crotch in my face when I'm receiving… and the BJ is really overwhelming for me when I'm trying to give pleasure.' Another male Redditor summed it up: 'It's like two people giving each other a massage. Feels like for the relaxation to be fully enjoyed, one person should go at a time.' Others admitted they've never climaxed or made their partner climax while 69-ing, preferring to take turns.
'The main problem with this position is that you are both givers and takers at the same time,' added another. 'As a giver it's hard to focus, and as a taker you can't relax. It's one of the worst positions ever.'
Women's Perspectives
Women echo similar sentiments. One woman explained: 'I don't enjoy oral unless I can really concentrate on every subtle thing that he does and how good it feels. Otherwise it just feels like someone tickling me in an uncomfortable way. And when I have a dick in my face, I am pretty unaware of anything going on with the rest of my body. It's just so demanding and there in my face. So it ends up being a blow job in an uncomfortable position with someone tickling me somewhere and an obligation to enjoy it.'
A study of over 2,000 women by Seduce AI found that 29% rated the 69 as their most disliked sex position. They cited the division of attention between giving and receiving pleasure as a turn-off, leading to frustration and lack of sexual satisfaction. One woman said: 'I don't like it. It's supposed to be double fun, but I can't focus on any of the two and as a result neither of the two is fun.' Others were surprised anyone actually likes it.
Additional Concerns for Women
Women also shared unique concerns. One admitted: 'There's nothing appealing about it, and I'd feel self-conscious in that position.' Another added: 'It's a really awkward blowjob angle and his nose ends up too close to my butthole for comfort.' The exposure of having one's naked behind on display so close to a partner's face can be unsettling.
Expert Opinion
Sexologist and author Gigi Engle says: 'No sex position is for everyone but people have a lot of divisive opinions about 69-ing – they either love it, or they hate it. In my experience, most people don't like it.' She notes that giving a blowjob requires focus and can be exhausting, making it hard to enjoy receiving oral. However, she believes the 69 can be fun if the focus is on mutual pleasure rather than climaxing. 'It doesn't need to be about putting on a performance, just enjoy the intimacy of pleasuring your partner, while they're pleasuring you.'
A Different Perspective
Yet, not everyone dislikes it. One writer in Metro's 'How I Do It' sex diary revealed: 'These days, 69 is definitely our go-to position for passion. We always finish together and my orgasms are so much more intense (and frequent).' She added that while they have less penis-in-vagina sex than before kids, their encounters are more satisfying.
Ultimately, as Gigi says, 'different strokes for different folks.' If the 69 is a turn-off for you, that's perfectly fine.
