A Date from Hell: Escorted Out After Drunken Rage, I Stayed for Another Drink
Several months after ending a two-year relationship, I was enjoying afternoon tea and gossip with a friend at an upscale London restaurant when an expensively dressed man approached me. Wearing a cashmere jumper and designer trousers, he introduced himself as James* and boldly asked for my number. Impressed by his confidence and courage, I agreed, thinking it was time to put myself out there again after my breakup.
On the day of the date, I felt nervous but pushed my reservations aside, meeting him at a swanky private members' club for drinks and dinner. Initially, he seemed nice and grounded, asking many questions and showing genuine interest in me. As a non-drinker, I ordered sparkling water when the waiter came, and James didn't mind, even offering to abstain. However, I was surprised when he ordered an entire bottle of red wine for himself, which he steadily consumed.
The Trouble Begins
We then moved to a fancy five-star restaurant for dinner, where the real trouble started. James ordered another bottle of wine and a cocktail, leading to slurred speech and drowsiness. Despite this, he insisted on ordering multiple dishes, wanting to try everything on the menu. Feeling on edge and anxious, I texted my mum from the bathroom, expressing my concerns. She suggested giving him a chance, so I returned to the table.
Plates of lobster spaghetti, rabbit, venison, chicken cutlets, truffle fries, and more kept arriving. The starter, a burrata dish served with chilli oil and flakes, triggered a rage in James. He loudly complained to a waitress, bragging about dining at Michelin-star restaurants worldwide and claiming Italians would never serve burrata with chilli flakes. In a Karen-like manner, he demanded to speak to the manager, shouting and swearing at everyone.
Embarrassed and shellshocked, I tried to calm him down as other diners stared, clearly concerned. Realizing he was a horrible person, I knew I needed to escape this date from hell. We ordered an Uber, and the manager escorted us out due to James's drunken state and the numerous bottles on the table.
An Odd Decision to Continue
Surprisingly, when James asked if I wanted to join him at another bar to meet his friends, I agreed, perhaps out of pity. At the next location, he ordered tequila and became a mess. Seeing his friends handle him, I decided to leave, but he persisted, asking me to take my coat off and suggesting we go to his place for a movie and dessert.
After escaping in a taxi, he repeatedly called me that night, which I ignored. The next day, he texted and sent a voice note, asking if he had upset me. I replied that his behavior didn't align with what I was looking for in a man. He apologized and made excuses, but I ignored him, my mind firmly made up.
Reflections and Lessons Learned
Looking back, I wonder why I didn't leave sooner. I may have internalized societal expectations for women to be demure and avoid making a scene, coupled with boundary issues. Since then, I've learned to stand up for myself and remove myself from uncomfortable situations. I now have a stricter vetting system for dates, ensuring I prioritize my well-being.
*Names have been changed for privacy.
