Count Binface has released his manifesto for the Clacton by-election, promising to make arcade grabber games fairer and to reject gifts from crypto billionaires. The comedy candidate is Nigel Farage's top rival after the Reform UK leader unexpectedly resigned as an MP to rerun in the resulting by-election.
Binface emerges as threat to Farage
Farage's move appeared to backfire when major parties refused to contest the vote, calling it a 'stunt' and 'vanity project'. As a result, he faces 33 opponents – a record for a UK parliamentary election – mostly fringe figures or comedy characters. Count Binface has captured public imagination, with Sir Keir Starmer and Rachel Reeves among those enjoying the idea of Farage spending summer 'arguing with a bin'.
A poll earlier this month found 33% of the public wanted Binface to win the by-election, compared to 21% who said Farage.
Key pledges in the Clacton Manifesto
Binface's manifesto includes boosting the region's economy, cutting taxes while raising others', capping bus fares at £1.99, and limiting 99 Flake ice-creams to 99p. He promises to spend more time in Clacton than in Washington DC, and to champion the area. Other pledges: barring MPs who resign mid-parliament from the resulting by-election, forcing party-switching MPs to face a by-election, building at least one affordable house, and making arcade grabber games fairer so players actually have a chance to win.
He also proposes oil and gas companies pay for solar panels for everyone (from Jack, aged 10), regenerating Walton Pier, a windfall tax on cosy crime novels 'written' by celebrities, filling potholes using copies of the 2024 Labour Party Manifesto, and moving Parliament to his new Bin HQ in Weeley while the Palace of Westminster is restored. People with annoyingly loud exhausts driving past Clacton station would lose their licence.
International and cultural promises
Binface vows not to accept £5 million gifts from crypto billionaires (on Earth), hold a referendum on whether Pluto should regain its planet status, move the hand-dryer in the gents' toilet at the Great Himalayas restaurant in Southport to a more sensible position, and appoint Wayne Rooney as new expert summariser for the BBC at Eurovision. He also pledges to represent the UK at Eurovision 2027, with Clacton hosting Eurovision 2028.
He stands by past manifestos including Ceefax, speakerphones, nationalising Adele, renaming HS2 'FFS1', and the hand-dryer at the Crown & Treaty.
