While personal preferences in the bedroom vary widely, there's one particular sex position that both men and women often secretly consider among the least enjoyable. According to numerous discussions and studies, the classic 69 position frequently receives criticism from both genders for similar reasons.
The Multitasking Dilemma
Both men and women report that the fundamental problem with the 69 position lies in its requirement for simultaneous giving and receiving. This dual focus creates a challenging dynamic where neither partner can fully concentrate on either aspect of the intimate experience.
Male Perspectives
Many men express frustration with the position's divided attention demands. One 28-year-old man explained his experience, stating that while he enjoys both giving and receiving pleasure separately, combining them in the 69 format makes it difficult to appreciate either activity properly.
Another male contributor compared the experience to two people attempting to massage each other simultaneously, suggesting that true relaxation and enjoyment require taking turns rather than simultaneous action. Several men noted they've never achieved climax during 69-ing and find greater satisfaction in alternating focus with their partners.
Female Viewpoints
Women echo similar concerns about divided attention. One woman described how oral pleasure requires complete concentration on subtle sensations, which becomes impossible when multitasking. She explained that having a partner's anatomy in her face creates distraction that prevents her from focusing on her own bodily sensations.
A study involving over 2,000 women revealed that 29% considered the 69 position their most disliked sexual arrangement. Researchers found women particularly objected to the division of attention between giving and receiving pleasure, which often resulted in frustration and diminished sexual satisfaction.
Additional Female Concerns
Beyond the multitasking issue, women frequently mention additional discomforts specific to the 69 position. Many express feeling self-conscious about their physical exposure during this intimate arrangement.
One woman admitted the position feels overly revealing, while another noted practical discomfort with anatomical proximity that creates awkward angles and uncomfortable closeness. These factors combine to make the experience less enjoyable for many women.
Expert Analysis
Sexologist Gigi Engle, author of Kink Curious, confirms that the 69 position generates strongly divided opinions. She notes that most people she encounters don't particularly enjoy it, though some do find it pleasurable.
Engle acknowledges that performing oral sex requires significant focus and physical effort, which becomes challenging when simultaneously receiving stimulation. She suggests that those who dislike intense eye contact during intimacy might particularly struggle with this position.
However, Engle offers an alternative perspective, suggesting that approaching 69-ing without pressure to climax can transform the experience. When viewed as mutual pleasure exploration rather than performance, some couples find it enhances intimacy.
The Exception That Proves the Rule
Despite widespread criticism, some individuals do enjoy the 69 position. One woman participating in a sexual diary study described it as her preferred method for concluding intimate encounters, noting intensified and more frequent orgasms through this mutual approach.
This divergence highlights the fundamental truth about sexual preferences: what works wonderfully for some couples proves disappointing for others. As Engle summarizes, different approaches suit different people, and there's no universal right or wrong in intimate matters.
Ultimately, whether the 69 position enhances or diminishes sexual satisfaction depends entirely on individual preferences and couple dynamics. The key lies in open communication about what brings mutual pleasure and comfort in intimate relationships.
