Regular sexual activity is widely known to offer a host of benefits, from lowering stress to giving your immune system a lift. However, a significant number of people in the UK are not experiencing these rewards, according to the latest National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles.
The 2023 data revealed that 16% of men and 22% of women aged 16 to 74 reported being sexually inactive. This trend of abstaining is becoming more openly discussed, even among celebrities.
Khloé Kardashian recently shared during the premiere of her show's new season that she hasn't had sex in over three years, linking her happiness to this choice. Similarly, on I'm A Celebrity, Tulisa Contostavlos disclosed a celibacy period of more than three years.
The Emotional and Physical Repercussions of Celibacy
Defining what constitutes a break from sex is a personal matter. Dr Angela Wright, a clinical sexologist at The Portland Hospital, clarifies that society often narrowly defines sex as penetration, but celibacy can mean different things to different people. It might involve avoiding all partnered sexual contact while still embracing solo practices or other forms of intimacy.
Being mindful of the touch you want and your boundaries is a crucial part of this process, she emphasises.
Potential Benefits for Your Wellbeing
As Khloé Kardashian suggested, choosing celibacy can usher in a period of positive personal growth. Annabelle Knight, a sex and relationships expert at Lovehoney, is a proponent of the emotional advantages.
She explains that celibacy can provide the necessary space to reconnect with your own body and boundaries, helping you understand what you truly desire from intimacy. For many, it becomes a time of rediscovery, focusing on self-care and finding pleasure in other areas of life.
Annabelle Knight states: "Everyone's needs and timelines are different, and periods of celibacy can be really positive for some people."
Unexpected Physical Changes to Consider
However, the experience isn't without potential physical downsides. Dr Bhavini Shah from LloydsPharmacy Online Doctor highlights that women may experience vaginal dryness linked to abstaining from sex.
This can make penetration uncomfortable upon resuming sexual activity, potentially leading to a condition called dyspareunia, which involves pain before, during, or after sex. Dr Shah notes that other factors like hormonal changes or infections can also cause this.
For those with penises, Annabelle Knight explains that spontaneous erections are a normal bodily function that continues regardless of sexual activity, acting as a natural maintenance system. She notes that while these may occur less frequently during a dry spell, the effect is temporary and typically reverses when sexual activity resumes.
Contrary to the belief that celibacy leads to constant horniness, your libido can actually decrease or fluctuate. Annabelle Knight points out that desire is influenced more by factors like mood, body image, and relationship satisfaction than by the mere act of sex itself. A period of abstention can sometimes lead to a greater awareness of what truly triggers or suppresses your desire.
Giving Your Immune System a Respite
The impact on your immune system presents an interesting duality. While frequent sex is thought to boost immunity—one study cited by psychosexual therapist Silva Neves linked it to higher levels of immunoglobulin—taking a break can also be beneficial.
Annabelle Knight suggests that a pause from partnered sex allows your body and mind to rebalance. This reduction in stimulation can support deeper rest, free up mental energy, and act as a simple reset, potentially leaving you feeling more focused and refreshed, with improved sleep and energy levels.
