Amanda, a 67-year-old from Hampshire, is at her wit's end. Her 32-year-old son has never left home, pays no rent, contributes nothing to bills, and spends his estimated £35,000 salary entirely on himself. As she and her husband prepare for retirement and need to downsize, her son's refusal to move out has become a major roadblock. He has accused them of 'abandoning' him, claiming he cannot afford to rent in their area. Amanda feels guilty but also taken advantage of, and she has turned to consumer champion Sarah Davidson for legal and practical advice.
Legal Rights: Can You Ask an Adult Child to Leave?
Yes, absolutely. According to Sarah Davidson, because Amanda's son pays no rent and has no formal tenancy agreement, the law classifies him as an 'excluded occupier' or a bare licensee. This means he has very few legal rights to remain in the property. Amanda does not need a court order to evict him; she simply needs to give him 'reasonable notice' to leave. While the law does not strictly define 'reasonable,' in practice, 28 days is generally considered sufficient. For a family member, giving two to three months is more generous, but the deadline must be put in writing and enforced rigidly.
Financial Reality: Can He Afford to Move Out?
Davidson dismisses the son's claim that he cannot afford to rent as a 'convenient excuse.' With a salary of £35,000, his take-home pay is around £2,350 per month. According to the latest Office for National Statistics figures, the average private rent in the UK is £1,442 per month. While that is an average, a single person on his salary can definitely afford a room in a house share or a modest one-bedroom flat in Hampshire, even if it means budgeting for the first time in his life. The son has enjoyed a decade of consequence-free living, with 100% disposable income, and has spent it all on himself rather than saving for a deposit.
How to Approach the Conversation Without Destroying the Relationship
The harder question is how to ask him to leave without destroying the relationship. Davidson advises that the relationship is already being damaged by the son's sense of entitlement and Amanda's growing resentment. She suggests sitting down with him, along with her husband, and presenting the move as a non-negotiable financial reality rather than a punishment. Explain that they are retired, the house is being sold, and he needs to find his own accommodation by a specific date. Avoid getting drawn into arguments about his spending habits or claims of abandonment; stick to the logistics.
Practical Steps and a Potential Olive Branch
If Amanda can afford it and wants to, she could soften the blow by offering to pay the deposit on his first rental property. This removes his final excuse for staying and frames the boundary-setting as a supportive transition rather than an eviction. But either way, she must hold firm. As Davidson puts it, 'You have spent 32 years putting a roof over his head — now it's time for him to pay for his own.'
