Guardian readers have shared their most painful viewing experiences in a remarkable collection of zero-star screen disasters that range from Hollywood flops to theatrical catastrophes.
Cinematic Calamities That Missed the Mark
The 1987 film Ishtar emerges as a particular low point, described as "less exciting than a tricycle accident" and "less witty than a stunned mollusc." Starring Warren Beatty and Dustin Hoffman, this 107-minute Moroccan desert adventure apparently feels like an eternity of cinematic suffering.
Another notable disaster came with Waterworld in 1995. Despite Kevin Costner's earnest performance and Dennis Hopper's gloriously over-the-top acting, viewers found it "unintentionally hilarious" rather than the serious post-apocalyptic drama intended. One reader recalled "cackling" through what became a "five-star bonding experience" despite the zero-star quality.
More recently, Playmobil: The Movie in 2019 disappointed those hoping for another Lego Movie-style success. Described as "excruciating," the film apparently peaked early with an unexpectedly dark moment where police inform characters of their parents' death.
Television Tragedies and Theatrical Turkeys
Ricky Gervais's series After Life (2019-2022) divided audiences, with one viewer stating they're "still processing how awful it was." The show's constant swearing and what some perceived as unlikeable character behaviour apparently failed to deliver the emotional depth intended.
The 1970s television show Lancelot Link: Secret Chimp was recalled as particularly "exploitative and vile," featuring chimpanzees dressed up with dubbed dialogue that left one viewer's eyes and brain still aching decades later.
Theatre productions didn't escape criticism either. The 1999 production of Moonshine at Hampstead Theatre was such a disaster that audiences fled at interval, leaving the theatre almost empty for the second act. The artistic director reportedly tried to convince remaining patrons to "give the work a chance" despite its incomprehensible plot and stultifying dialogue.
Cult Classics of Terribleness
Some films have gained notoriety precisely for their awfulness. The Room (2003) has become a cult classic for how terrible it is, though one viewer still finds it "completely unwatchable" and complains that "it feels like it never ends."
M Night Shyamalan's Unbreakable (2000) disappointed fans expecting another Sixth Sense, particularly when Samuel L Jackson's character claimed Egyptian hieroglyphics were like comic books - a moment that made one viewer exclaim "No, they're not!" aloud in the cinema.
The musical adaptation of An Officer and a Gentleman in Sydney during 2012 was remembered as particularly traumatic, with inappropriate nudity and performances that made more than half the audience leave at intermission.
From the "wafer-thin" plots of 1998's Babes in the Wood to the anticipation-disappointment cycle of upcoming releases, these zero-star experiences prove that even with big budgets and famous names, screen projects can still spectacularly miss the mark and create lasting memories for all the wrong reasons.
