Living in a fairly average town in Oxfordshire, I never felt truly part of the community despite having friends and family nearby. I didn't feel rooted, and my interactions with neighbours were limited to quick hellos. I moved here in my late 20s with my partner and spent a lot of time at home. In my 30s, I got a dog, had children, and started working from home. Although I spent more time in my local area, I still felt like an outsider. This lack of connection made me feel isolated—until I started volunteering.
The Catalyst: Joining the PTA
It all began with the parent-teacher association (PTA). Before having children, I never imagined I would become a PTA member. I thought only certain parents with a passion for clipboards and too much free time got involved. However, when a friend mentioned the PTA at my children's school needed volunteers for the summer fete, I decided to give it a try. I was tasked with running the glitter face-paint stall and spent a joyful couple of hours covered in sparkles. My technique was questionable, but I had wonderful conversations and fun while attempting to make glitter stick to people's faces.
Since then, I have become a fully signed-up member of the PTA. I have applied temporary tattoos, sold cakes, and run the bottle tombola. I have set up countless folding tables and moved many boxes of fizzy drinks, sweets, and pocket money toys for school discos. The experience has been overwhelmingly positive and completely changed my opinion about rolling up my sleeves and getting stuck in.
Unexpected Benefits
I love getting to see a bit more of my children's lives and discovering what they are like at school. I have also really enjoyed meeting other PTA members—they are far from the cliched image I had in my head. I have heard horror stories about PTA politics, but luckily I have never experienced any of it. Everyone in our PTA has a job and volunteers around their work, life, and family; it's not the image of cliquey parents I expected. There is no pressure, but there is the option to get involved when you can, in ways that work for you.
Expanding Horizons: Parkrun Marshal
This approach to volunteering led me to sign up as a marshal at my local parkrun. Spending Saturday mornings in a wet field, directing runners while wearing a hi-vis jacket, wasn't on my vision board, but it has been a real joy. The runners are very grateful to the volunteers, and I feel a genuine sense of community and connection when I do it. It's hard not to when hundreds of runners say thank you or wish you a lovely weekend as they pass. Walking back to the start line, I feel like a local celebrity—everyone is so nice, and it makes me want to be a nicer person, too.
Building Bonds Through Shared Experiences
Getting involved in the PTA and parkrun has helped me meet and talk to many people I wouldn't normally encounter. It's easy to bond over an unlucky draw in the tombola, and being caught in the rain or mud together is a great icebreaker. When my children were very young, I couldn't understand how people had the time or energy to volunteer for anything. I was too busy trying to survive early motherhood. But as they have grown older, I have found more time and energy.
The Helper's High
Volunteering helps other people, but it has also boosted my mood. I have experienced the helper's high—feeling good after doing something for other people—and I also feel a deeper sense of connection to the neighbourhood and people around me. I volunteer sporadically and when it works for me. It is not a huge inconvenience. It brings so much happiness to my life, and I have realised that the best way for me to find a sense of community is to get involved and help create it myself.
