Missy Bo Kearns, the Aston Villa and England midfielder, has opened up about the 'different type of grief' she experienced after suffering a miscarriage last month. The 25-year-old had announced her pregnancy just over two weeks before tragically losing the baby she was expecting with her partner, Liam Walsh.
A Sudden Health Crisis
Speaking to ITV News, Kearns recounted the terrifying events of 18 March, when she thought she was experiencing pregnancy symptoms but was actually battling sepsis. She had a temperature of 42C and was shaking uncontrollably. The Aston Villa team doctor, Dr Jodie Blackadder-Weinstein, urged her to call Walsh and get to the hospital immediately.
'It was one of the biggest shocks of my life,' Kearns said. 'I'd literally been doing pilates and gym an hour before, and my whole life just changed like that.' At the hospital, she learned she had lost the baby and had developed sepsis.
Four Days of Hell
Kearns described the following days as 'four days of hell in hospital'. She expressed deep gratitude for the medical team at Villa, stating, 'They probably saved my life because I had sepsis, and while having that, I wasn't even thinking about the sepsis, it was: 'I've lost my child.'' The psychological impact has been immense, and she hopes that sharing her story will encourage others to speak out.
Breaking the Silence
'People might not realise how much of a toll it actually has on someone,' she said. 'Obviously, everyone knows how hard it must be to lose a child, but because of the highs of finding out you're pregnant, and the stress of being pregnant, and like, the worries of getting past the 12-week mark, it's so stressful, even though it's so exciting. To then have that crash, and then suddenly you're not pregnant, and your hormones change, your symptoms start to go, like overnight, it's a different type of grief.'
She added, 'People don't tell people that they've been through it. They suffer in silence, and I just hope that people may not suffer in silence now, knowing that, like I'm here, if anyone wants to speak, there are charities like Tommy's and so many other charities if anyone needs them.'
Coping and Moving Forward
Returning to normal life at Aston Villa has been challenging. 'When you realise the plans that you had coming up aren't the same plans any more, this is when it starts to hit you,' Kearns explained. 'The past week or so is where it's hit me. Most of them, I've been struggling, a lot more than the first week or so. I've been trying to keep myself busy. I wouldn't say I'm fully coping.'
Despite the pain, Kearns remains hopeful. 'You actually feel like you're the only person it's ever happened to. But really, it's so common, and that's why I think it's important that the message is out there.' She is grateful for her youth and the opportunity to try again when the time is right.
World Cup Ambitions
Her target remains next year's World Cup. 'My plan while I was pregnant was to make the World Cup squad, and that's not changed,' she said. 'I've realised there's more to life than football, but now I'm going to enjoy every minute of football like it's my last because it could have been.'
