Clarke Gayford, known as the husband of former New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern, has spent the last three years living out of a suitcase between Auckland, Boston, Spain, London, and now Sydney. Reflecting on what makes a place a home, he shares a story about his sister's cat that chose to move with its family to a temporary home, demonstrating that home is about companionship, not location.
The Cat's Lesson
When his sister and her family renovated their home, a neighbor offered an empty place to stay. The cat, however, decided to join them, crossing the street to be with its humans. Gayford realized that the cat's home was anchored by the people, not the place.
What Ties Us to a Place
Gayford asks, 'What ties you to an area where all the sensory touchstones of familiarity seep just a little deeper under your skin, triggering that strong emotional response?' He describes the feeling of arriving at a place that feels like home, where even the unique blend of pollens and pollution signals comfort.
Housing and Community
Driving through Sydney, his seven-year-old asked about the number of houses in the world. Gayford notes that in Australia, there is a house for every 2.5 people, a stark contrast to his first university flat shared by seven with one outdoor toilet. He emphasizes that countries with enhanced renters' rights create greater stability and community.
The Māori Concept of Tūrangawaewae
Gayford explains that the English language struggles to capture the broader feeling of home, while the Māori word 'tūrangawaewae' does it perfectly. It translates to 'a place to stand' but signifies a home base where one has a sense of belonging through kinship and connection, empowering identity and security.
Moving a House
Gayford recalls filming a TV show where Kiwi couples rescued and moved old houses to new locations. One story that stuck with him was an older couple who moved their entire 100-year-old villa to be closer to family, demonstrating the deep connection to the memories and comfort their home provided.
While New Zealand will always be home, Gayford looks forward to experiencing a sense of belonging in Australia.
