The Book Club Intruder: A Six-Year Standoff
Guardian columnist Tim Dowling finds himself at the centre of a domestic literary dispute that has been simmering for six years. The conflict revolves around his controversial membership in a local book club originally established by his wife with four other women.
The trouble began during the inaugural meeting hosted at their home. Although not invited, Dowling noticed fine cheeses being served and eventually made his appearance when the gathering blocked access to his next glass of wine. His casual comment about having read the book under discussion sparked a conversation that would cement his unofficial membership.
The WhatsApp Gateway and Perfect Attendance
Despite his wife's attempts to bar him from subsequent meetings, Dowling secured his position by joining the group's WhatsApp chat. Over the years, membership has fluctuated, with another man briefly joining, but for the past five years, Dowling has maintained his status as the sole male member with an impeccable attendance record.
The equilibrium shattered when a scheduling conflict forced Dowling to miss a meeting for the first time. His wife saw this as the perfect opportunity to finally achieve what she'd wanted for years: his permanent removal from the literary circle.
The Campaign for Removal and Pudding Diplomacy
"I've always been trying to get you kicked out of book club," his wife confessed during a car journey four weeks after his absence. When she pointed out he hadn't even read the current selection, Dowling discovered he didn't even know which book they were discussing.
Rather than accepting defeat, Dowling fought back by ordering the book and reading it within 48 hours. He arrived at the next meeting armed with homemade pudding and fresh insights about the novel, having devoured it just in time.
During the evening's discussions, the marital conflict became public knowledge when Dowling referenced "a whispering campaign" against him. His wife openly admitted: "I'm actively agitating to have him removed." The other members, including Emma, defended him, saying "But we like him."
The next morning, the WhatsApp group was buzzing with praise - not for his literary analysis, but for his pudding. The six-year battle continues, with Dowling still firmly embedded in the book club his wife founded, proving that sometimes dessert speaks louder than words.
