Actress Tommy Dorfman has publicly called out a man for sending transphobic messages while sitting beside her on a plane. The 33-year-old American star, best known for her role in Netflix's 13 Reasons Why and appearances in Jane the Virgin and Love, Victor, as well as being a guest judge on RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars, took to Instagram to share screenshots of the man's phone screen as he texted contacts using disgusting language, calling her a 'freak'.
In June 2021, after coming out as non-binary four years earlier, Dorfman came out as a transgender woman and began using she/her pronouns. She has spoken candidly about her gender identity and sexuality for years, coming out as a lesbian in 2022 and eloping with her girlfriend a year later. The latest incident involves her upsetting experience on a flight this week.
According to Dorfman's photos, the individual typed: 'I am in the first aisle of First Class. Guess what is sitting next to me? A f***ing transsexual in the midst of going from a man to a woman. Just my luck. I was hoping for a hot babe!!' She quipped in her caption, 'Someone get your grandpa', also posting a photo of a text to a woman named Samantha that said: '2 and a half hours of sitting next to this freak!!' The recipient replied, 'Just remember, many people you love are lgbtq+ and this country sucks for them right now. Be kind!', to which Dorfman wrote in appreciation: 'Wait Samantha ily girl.'
She also saw the funny side when a contact named Dave replied to the man about his hopes for a 'hot babe' with, 'You got one! A brand new one,' with Dorfman adding: 'Also Dave (?) kinda tore w this'. Delving further into the severity of the matter, Dorfman penned a lengthy caption about feeling 'unsafe' in America as a trans person. She wrote: 'Objectively, i know i'm not “passing” and i'm “bricky” and “clocky” but passing hasn't been the point for me nor should it be for any trans person. We are all allowed to evolve in any way that feels true and that evolution can expand and contract. It's always been about alignment and autonomy for my own comfort, not the comfort of others or the expectations of society.'
She continued: 'The audacity of this man so blatantly blasting off texts about me (sparing you the deeply misogynistic and revolting comments on our flight attendants in contrast to my freak) only reaffirms the choices i've made for myself to feel safe and comfortable in my body and spirit. This does come at the cost of safety and comfort in the world, especially in america, and that's not without consequence internally and externally.' She concluded: 'I am lucky to have the life i have, the ability to fly freely (for now), and even post s**t like this. And why post, you may wonder? Because i can and this man is an alt right vampire AND because samantha deserves her flowers.'
The TV star was quickly inundated with supportive comments after her post went viral. Amanda Seyfried wrote: 'Scared and dumb all of ‘em ‘cept Sam'. Ellie Goulding wrote: 'What a sad deranged troubled person. I’m angry. Sending you love'. Liza Koshy added: 'We love YOU and we looove Samantha.' Fans also praised Dorfman for her 'beautiful' words, with @iamwestdakota calling the individual a 'boring, miserable man' and @bbrooklynmae branding him 'embarrassing'.
The interaction later reached other platforms, with thousands of Reddit users grossed out by the man's 'horrible' messages. One user asked: 'How insecure do you have to be to be so bothered by somebody who’s not you for existing?' Another wrote: '“Guess what is sitting next to me.” They don’t even see trans people as human.'
When Dorfman first came out as trans, she explained to Time magazine: 'It’s funny to think about coming out, because I haven’t gone anywhere. I view today as a reintroduction to me as a woman, having made a transition medically. Coming out is always viewed as this grand reveal, but I was never not out. Today is about clarity: I am a trans woman. My pronouns are she/her. My name is Tommy.' On keeping her name, she added: 'I’m named after my mum’s brother, who passed a month after I was born, and I feel very connected to that name, to an uncle who held me as he was dying. This is an evolution of Tommy. I’m becoming more Tommy.'
A year later, the star admitted that she was overwhelmed by the response to her reintroduction, saying she 'didn’t know it would be as expansive as it was'. Chatting to Chella Man and Aaron Rose Philip, she recalled feeling like she had been doing a 'disservice' by not speaking about her true self. She also expressed her passion for helping other trans people by sharing her story on a large scale, 'in the hopes of one, two, 20, however many people seeing this feel less alone and feel more confident in talking about themselves.'
