Late-Night Comedians Unleash Fury on Trump's Marathon State of the Union Address
Late-night television hosts delivered a blistering response to Donald Trump's record-breaking State of the Union address, which clocked in at 107 minutes on Tuesday night. Jimmy Kimmel led the charge with particularly sharp criticism, labeling the former president a "nutjob wannabe king" who actively suppresses dissenting opinions.
Kimmel's Scathing Assessment of the Speech
Jimmy Kimmel, who recorded his show during Trump's marathon address, offered a brutal summary of what he witnessed. "What a speech it wasn't," Kimmel declared of the meandering presentation. He characterized the theme as "all foreigners are murderers" and mocked Trump's claims about immigration enforcement.
"When you ramble incoherently for two hours, is that technically still a speech or does it at some point become a conniption fit?" Kimmel questioned. "The speech went on so long Kristi Noem's dog shot itself."
Kimmel played several of Trump's most divisive lines, including the claim that "Democrats are destroying our country, but we stopped it just in the nick of time." The host lamented, "I have to say: Trump's dementia really makes me miss Joe Biden's dementia. It was a much friendlier dementia."
The "Real" State of the Union According to Kimmel
Kimmel concluded with what he called the actual state of affairs: "We have a nutjob wannabe king who's doing everything he can to censor opinions he doesn't want to hear. He has his goons arresting, incarcerating and killing American citizens. He's cut funding for cancer research at children's hospitals while he rakes in literally billions of dollars for himself and his family."
The host continued his indictment: "He's coming after our right to vote. He's protecting pedophiles and won't explain it. He's lining the pockets of billionaires, all while neglecting the sick, the poor and the hungry – in the name of Jesus by the way, who you can read all about in the Donald Trump edition of the God Bless the USA Bible, that is made in China and available for $99.99. That is the state of the union."
Colbert's Take on Trump's Performance
Stephen Colbert, whose Late Show taped live following Trump's address, noted that the official theme was "America at 250: Strong, Prosperous, and Respected." Colbert quipped, "Though if you have to say you're strong, prosperous and respected it kind of feels like you're not."
Colbert observed that Trump arrived at the Capitol "looking a little tired, but his hair was nice and fluffy. Personally, I think he could have kept his head in the cotton candy machine a little bit longer."
The host summarized the nearly two-hour address as containing little new material: "Honoring our veterans and our first responders aside, it was a dark speech filled with divisive lies, and it's unlikely to win him much support with the voters who have grown disenchanted with the chaos and dysfunction of his second administration."
Meyers' Preemptive Fact-Checking
Seth Meyers, whose Late Night taped before Trump's address, anticipated the length of the speech. "Oh yeah, I think we're all expecting that," Meyers said. "You're incapable of being brief. Even if you were just going to read a haiku, I would expect two intermissions."
Meyers offered what he called "advance fact-checking": "Not true, not true, OJ's White Bronco was not driven by Joe Biden, not true, not true, and actually Jonathan Bailey is People's Sexiest Man Alive."
The host referenced Trump's complaint about not receiving credit for accomplishments, responding to Trump's hypothetical claim about curing cancer: "I don't know. If you came up with a cure for cancer, I would lose respect for cancer."
The Daily Show's Focus on Administration Scandals
On The Daily Show, Desi Lydic provided an update on Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem, who has been embroiled in allegations of an affair with her deputy, Corey Lewandowski. "Guys, finally this administration has a sex scandal involving consenting adults," Lydic deadpanned. "We did it! USA, USA, USA!"
Lydic revealed that the two have reportedly been using a luxury 737 Max jet worth $70 million, outfitted with a private cabin, for their travels around the country on taxpayer money. "OK, so they're flying around on a taxpayer-funded fuck plane," said Lydic. "How do they justify charging the country for their bang bus in the sky?"
According to reports, they claimed the large plane was needed for "immigrant deportation flights." Lydic mocked this justification: "Oh yeah, I'm so sure this is the plane they're using to deport illegal immigrants. Could you imagine actually being deported on that plane? And the whole time you're hearing Corey and Kristi Noem grunting in the back?"
The segment also revealed that Lewandowski allegedly fired a Coast Guard pilot after she forgot her blanket when they switched planes, only to reinstate her when no other pilot was available. "Oh my God, could this get any dumber?" Lydic mocked. "The only way this could get any dumber is, I don't know, deporting 10 million people and then realizing that they were the ones that did all the hard jobs."
The collective response from late-night hosts highlighted their continued role as political commentators, using humor to critique what they characterized as a divisive and problematic administration. Their segments reached millions of viewers, offering an alternative perspective to Trump's official messaging during a crucial political moment.
