Hickeys, once a ubiquitous teenage rite of passage, have become a rare sight among adults. Sexuality experts and daters weigh in on the decline and potential revival of love bites as a symbol of playful intimacy.
The Disappearance of Love Bites
For many, hickeys were a mark of adolescent passion, proudly displayed or concealed with makeup. But in recent years, they have all but vanished from adult dating. A friend's comment about seeing a 'chic' hickey on a bus sparked curiosity: where have all the hickeys gone?
Sexuality expert Courtney Boyer tells Metro that adults often feel pressured to be serious and intense during intimacy, eliminating playfulness. 'We often forget that sex is meant to be fun and doesn’t have to be serious all the time,' she says. Many associate hickeys with teenage relationships, leading to avoidance in adult encounters.
The 'Cringe' Factor and Concealment
Denise, a 27-year-old Metro reader, admits she loves receiving hickeys but conceals them around friends and colleagues due to fear of being perceived as 'unserious.' She prefers love bites on the chest or inner thighs. Sexpert Courtney adds that people may avoid hickeys to not appear 'inexperienced.'
However, dater Chloe Bailey, 25, from Greenwich, reframes hickeys as a sign of casual fun. After a decade-long relationship, she sees them as 'a perfect example of human connection, passionate and almost primal.' She encourages giving them a try with consent.
Renewed Interest in Biting
Despite fears, appetite for love bites persists. Data from ethical porn site Lustery shows search interest in 'biting' has increased by about 30% this year compared to last year, including terms like hickeys, love bites, and neck biting. For Denise, the turn-on is about being 'marked' as a souvenir of intimacy. 'Every time I spot it in the mirror it gives me goosebumps,' she says.
Filipa Castro, 28, from North London, finds hickeys 'hot' and loves when they happen accidentally. 'Seeing a hickey in the mirror the day after makes me feel wanted and desired,' she tells Metro, calling it a 'sexy flashback.'
Understated Intimacy Trend
The revival of hickeys aligns with a broader trend toward understated intimacy. TikTok creator Tilly Ferrari has called for 'more snogging' that doesn't lead anywhere, labeling it an 'in' for 2026. BACP psychotherapist Susie Masterson calls kissing 'an underrated art.' Dating influencer Allora Dannon highlights 'romantic hugs' as a segue into naughtier moments. Adding a hickey builds anticipation, reminding that passion doesn't always require full sex.
