A 42-year-old stay-at-home mother from Surrey, Eleanor, is grappling with the suspicion that her husband of 12 years is having an affair with a junior colleague at his private equity firm. Earning approximately £450,000 annually including bonuses, the couple owns a £2.5 million house in Cobham and a seaside holiday home in Cornwall. Eleanor gave up her lucrative financial PR career to raise their three children and now seeks to secure the maximum possible financial settlement before confronting her husband.
However, family law expert Sarah Davidson delivers a sobering reality check: under current English and Welsh law, infidelity does not influence financial settlements. Since the introduction of no-fault divorce in April 2022, courts focus on meeting the future needs of both parties rather than punishing moral failings. Even before this change, adultery rarely affected asset division. The legal system views divorce as a practical exercise, not a tool for retribution.
What Eleanor Can Expect
The starting point for dividing assets in a 12-year marriage is a 50/50 split of the matrimonial pot, including the family home, holiday property, savings, and pension wealth. The court values the roles of homemaker and breadwinner equally, meaning Eleanor is entitled to half of the couple's assets.
Spousal Maintenance and Lifestyle
Eleanor's demand for ongoing maintenance to maintain her current lifestyle—including a nanny and horses—faces scrutiny. Modern family law aims for a clean break, encouraging both parties to become financially independent. While she may receive spousal and child maintenance for a transitional period, the court will assess reasonable needs rather than guarantee a luxury lifestyle indefinitely. Given her age (42) and PR background, she will be expected to re-enter the workforce once her children are older.
Davidson advises against using money as a weapon, as litigation can lead to substantial legal fees. Instead, Eleanor should hire a good family lawyer, gather financial documentation, and focus on a fair 50/50 capital division plus realistic maintenance. Maintaining civility may even encourage her husband to agree to a more generous settlement, especially to ensure stability for their children.
Ultimately, the key is to secure a settlement that provides security for rebuilding her life, rather than seeking punitive damages that the courts will not award.
