East Sussex Teacher Struck Off for Inappropriate Relationship with Boarding School Pupil
A teacher who repeatedly told a boarding school pupil "I love you" in personal messages has been permanently banned from the profession following a serious misconduct ruling. Benjamin Phelps, aged 31, was struck off by the Teaching Regulation Agency after a disciplinary panel uncovered multiple breaches of professional boundaries during his time at the prestigious St Bede's School in East Sussex.
Inappropriate Communications and Personal Meetings
The professional conduct panel determined that Mr Phelps, who served as a deputy boarding housemaster, tutor, and performing arts technician at the £30,000-a-year senior school, engaged in an inappropriate relationship with a student aged between 13 and 18. Evidence presented showed that he texted the pupil inappropriately, arranged meetings outside of lessons, engaged in hugging and cheek kissing, and even suggested skipping school to "eat in the car" together.
Among the most concerning evidence were WhatsApp messages exchanged between November 2023 and January 2024. One message read: "I hope you've had a good night, I'm falling asleep with my phone in my hand. I love you and wish you sweet dream!! Contact me about anything xxxxxx." Another stated: "Love you more every day. My heart fluttered every time you caught my eye x also, I love the hearts! Just ready them they'll stay close to me xx."
Escalation of Personal Relationship
The relationship intensified after the pupil contacted Mr Phelps in October 2023 regarding a personal matter that should have triggered safeguarding procedures—which the teacher failed to follow according to the panel. Instead of maintaining professional distance, Mr Phelps moved their communications to WhatsApp in January 2024, a platform not approved by the school for student-teacher interactions.
Their correspondence became increasingly personal, with messages scattered with kisses and emojis including phrases like "You have such a beautiful mind though, it's so pure and genuine, I've always said that" and "massive hugs on the pillow." In one particularly concerning exchange, Mr Phelps advised the student: "maybe delete this chat too in case they look through your phone."
Failed Professional Response
The situation reached a critical point in February 2024 when the student attempted to kiss Mr Phelps. While the panel found that he did not reciprocate this kiss and attempted to return their relationship to a more professional footing, he crucially failed to report the incident to school authorities. During the hearing, Mr Phelps admitted that with hindsight he had probably been flattered by the attention and acknowledged that some messages indicated he had developed romantic feelings.
The panel concluded that "both individually and cumulatively the activities" represented significant breaches of professional boundaries, though they did not prove an allegation that Mr Phelps pursued a course of conduct akin to grooming.
Consequences and Future Restrictions
Mr Phelps was dismissed from St Bede's School in April 2024 following an internal investigation. The Teaching Regulation Agency's professional conduct panel formally struck him off on January 16, 2026. While he retains the right to appeal the decision at the High Court, he cannot apply to have the prohibition order set aside until January 2030 at the earliest.
This case highlights the critical importance of maintaining appropriate professional boundaries in educational settings, particularly in boarding school environments where staff have extended access to students. The panel's decision serves as a stark reminder of the serious consequences that follow when educators fail to uphold their safeguarding responsibilities and professional standards.
