Sasha Goreshtein, a 38-year-old paralegal from Montreal, decided to have a second child with her on-again-off-again boyfriend to ensure her son Zayn, three, would have a full sibling rather than stepsiblings. The couple, who have been together for about five years, now have a 13-month-old son named Leon.
Motivation Behind the Decision
Sasha explained that she wanted Zayn to have a sibling bond similar to the one she shares with her own sister, whom she describes as her best friend. She was aware that her relationship might not last, but she did not want her son to experience the logistics of a blended family. "I kept picturing my son going from one house to another to visit his dad and visit his mum on his own," she said. "Let's say the father of my kid meets another woman, and he had a longer timeline and decided to have another child. My son would then go to my house, and go to see his half sibling only half the time."
Relationship Timeline and Co-Parenting
Sasha and her partner, 37, met when she was 33. She fell pregnant after just six months of dating, and Zayn was born in February 2023. The couple split when Zayn was two but continued to try to make the relationship work. "When you have a child with someone, cutting contact is impossible, so inevitably we kept trying to make it work," Sasha said. As she approached 40, she felt the pressure of her biological clock. "Yes, women can have children older, but for me, I didn't want a kid too late," she explained.
Weighing the Options
Sasha reasoned that even if the romantic relationship failed, her partner was a great father. "I already knew I had a father for my child who was a great father," she said. "We were still able to co-parent in a stable and respectful way. He's a truly incredible dad. Why go and take the risk of potentially meeting someone else if I don't know what kind of person he will be? Will he have the same values?" A conversation with a friend who is an only child also influenced her. "[My friend] often said she felt very alone, like there wasn't anyone who fully understood what she was going through within her own family dynamic. Hearing her perspective really stayed with me," Sasha added.
Decision to Try for a Second Child
While on holiday in Greece in 2024, the couple agreed to try for another baby. "We both wanted it, but I think I probably thought about it more than him," Sasha said. "As a man he didn't see the importance. I think I was more aware it might not end up working out in the future." The pair split again during Sasha's pregnancy but reunited after Leon was born. They are currently in a relationship but live separately.
Public Reaction and Clarifications
Sharing her story on social media, Sasha received both positive and negative feedback. Some criticized her views on blended families, suggesting she implied half-siblings are not true siblings. "It is absolutely not what I'm saying," Sasha clarified. "It's nothing to do with blood, it's more the logistics part." Others praised her decision, with some saying they felt less alone after hearing her story. "People said: 'Hey I love what you did, I have half siblings and I don't see them often and unfortunately I'm not as close with them as my full siblings and don't get to see them all the time, I wish I did,'" she recounted.
